It may have been Mama Gena who coined the term "pleasure tools." She has discovered some excellent verbiage to describe this Pleasure Path journey. You'll find the best of her basics in her book, Mama Gena's School of Womanly Arts.
In Mama's world, every woman can consider herself a "pleasure researcher" and hence, never fail at anything...because it's all research, see?
When you're feeling rotten, you're having a "pleasure emergency."
When you are making yourself feel rejuvenated and powerful, you are "fluffing" yourself.
When you clean up your clutter to rearrange your bedroom, bathroom, sock drawer or other non-pleasurable mess, it's called "pussifying," because you're not just cleaning up a mess, you're making way for a more pleasurable use of your stuff. You are pleasuring yourself by cleaning! The woman is a genius. This blog draws greatly on her contribution. After all, she's the one who coined the term, "the Pleasure Revolution."
The way I see it, your Pleasure Tools are the things you already reach for every day, but you haven't given them the proper credit yet. Or you may discover your pleasure tools in happenstance things you stumble across on your path and realize:
"Wow, I forgot! I love this activity/band/movie/color!"
If it makes you feel optimistic and refreshed, if it gives you a belly laugh or turns you on, then you have just found a Pleasure Tool. And if it makes you feel in touch with your core or your sense of purpose, then you know you've really found a gem, something you will want to return to again and again.
We tend to think that life is about hard work, that pleasure is something one gets around to only when the work is done. And yet, it's never really done. So... let's make room for pleasure's treasures now! Additionally, let's face it: life is very challenging. There are about a thousand ways in which daily circumstances can pummel our spirits, offering to make us feel worn down, used up or even "less-than." With your Pleasure Tools, you can "pedal" through it all with grace.
That morning cup of tea, the walk you take, a conversation with a friend: these aren't mere routines or distractions, they are actually saving your life.
And extra gold stars for you if you're taking a class just for your enjoyment, or get regular massages!
When you've elevated your favorite parts of life to the status of pleasure tools, you are now reaching for the things that make you happy, on purpose and with a goal in mind. The goal being, to be juiced and jazzed about living! Instead of merely stumbling through a life that seems to be mostly drudgery, broken by moments of happiness that occur by accident, savoring them hastily or even guiltily and then pushing them aside to go off and do the next "have to," as a nascent pleasure researcher, you can now prioritize these as your
Pleasure Tools: important items that are crucial in helping you get to where you want to go.
How so? As you start to pay attention to your pleasure, listening to your body, heeding its signals, you will be building your life on a foundation that you can really live with. That lump in your throat, that tickle in your stomach, that ahhhh of relief: these are the signals that tell you what's really true. When you start befriending these, you will be inviting synchronicity and your life can shift very quickly!
Are you job or house-hunting, rebounding from a breakup, trying to take your life to a higher level? Keep your Pleasure Tools close at hand, and things will go that much more deliciously.
Pleasure Homework: Write in a journal or on a piece of paper, a list of the things you do today that are just for you. Then add the things that you love out in the world that keep you feeling juiced, inspired and grateful. Keep your pleasure list with you and update it regularly! Is there something that makes the list but you don't include in your life nearly enough? Consider letting it in more.
Please report back to me below: I want to know what jazzes your life!
Friday, January 30, 2009
Thursday, January 22, 2009
What's So Great About Pleasure?
You may be wondering, "What's the big deal about this Pleasure Path, anyway?"
You may even be thinking that something as light and airy-sounding as "pleasure" is frivolous, trivial, irresponsible, decadent, a dangerous distraction. What kind of havoc would we wreak if we abandoned ourselves to the pursuit of pleasure?
Awakening to pleasure means noticing what makes us feel good and what makes us feel bad. And committing ourselves to feeling good. When we make this commitment, we are telling the world that our happiness and joy really do matter. That it is not tolerable to allow situations that rob us of our joy. We heed our feelings and intuition, we do the things that give us a sense of purpose.
You may even be thinking that something as light and airy-sounding as "pleasure" is frivolous, trivial, irresponsible, decadent, a dangerous distraction. What kind of havoc would we wreak if we abandoned ourselves to the pursuit of pleasure?
Awakening to pleasure means noticing what makes us feel good and what makes us feel bad. And committing ourselves to feeling good. When we make this commitment, we are telling the world that our happiness and joy really do matter. That it is not tolerable to allow situations that rob us of our joy. We heed our feelings and intuition, we do the things that give us a sense of purpose.
Prioritizing our pleasure means that we are actually showing up to life. And showing up is what the world really wants from us. It's what our kids want, what our partner wants, what our friends want, what our clients want. They may think they want things from us, but what they really want is us. We may think that we're showing up to do stuff for them but if we're unhappy, we are really just going through the motions. How many years could be wasted doing that? We may think that we can't afford the luxury of taking care of ourselves. But are we really doing anyone a service by being emotionally malnourished?
I'm sure any of us can remember those old-school old schoolteachers who were extremely cranky because they were unhappy. They sure made life hell for the kiddies. Yet they probably imagined that they were doing their duty by everyone. It was a waste of time, wasn't it?
The old airplane emergency procedure drill emphasizes that you have to put on your own oxygen mask before helping another person with theirs.
You already know intellectually that only when you take care of yourself can you take care of others. Pleasure -- seeking pleasure, getting to know your own pleasure points, is a quick and easy way to remember how to take care of yourself! It's portable, it's adaptable, it's ever-changing, and very personal. It either works, or it doesn't. And you can always try again!
A pleasure outlook makes the journey fun. And fun is serious business. Who is going to benefit your children or clients more, a stressed-out martyred you, or an energized, mischievous you?
So...Pleasure On, Baby!
I'm sure any of us can remember those old-school old schoolteachers who were extremely cranky because they were unhappy. They sure made life hell for the kiddies. Yet they probably imagined that they were doing their duty by everyone. It was a waste of time, wasn't it?
The old airplane emergency procedure drill emphasizes that you have to put on your own oxygen mask before helping another person with theirs.
You already know intellectually that only when you take care of yourself can you take care of others. Pleasure -- seeking pleasure, getting to know your own pleasure points, is a quick and easy way to remember how to take care of yourself! It's portable, it's adaptable, it's ever-changing, and very personal. It either works, or it doesn't. And you can always try again!
A pleasure outlook makes the journey fun. And fun is serious business. Who is going to benefit your children or clients more, a stressed-out martyred you, or an energized, mischievous you?
So...Pleasure On, Baby!
Tuesday, January 20, 2009
The Fine Art of Living
Welcome!
This blog is about inventing, sharing and enjoying some amazing tools we can use to enhance our lives. It's bound to be riotous and irreverent, and is probably not for the faint of heart.
A Frugal Goddess is a woman who knows how to coax out the deliciousness in every day, while being resposible her budget, responsive to her loved ones and fearlessly finding herself in just the right flow to create whatever she wants. Including world-changing adventures, financial freedom, more joy for herself and her family.
And the pleasure tools we'll be developing and discussing are exactly the medicine for men, too.
It all starts with your desires, your dreams, your pleasure. Noticing what makes you feel alive. Doing this more deliberately and supporting each other in doing so. Life is delicious, let's dine!
"Life is a feast, and most poor suckers are starving." - Rosalind Russell, as Auntie Mame
***
In advance, I'd like to let you know that this conversation owes a debt of gratitude to a writer and educator named Regena Thomashauer, aka Mama Gena, founder of the School of Womanly Arts in New York City. You can learn more about her at www.mamagenas.com.
She dares to posit that our pleasure is the life force in action - and therefore completely worthy of our undivided attention.
She is a founder, among many other delicious, dynamic and fearless humans throughout life, mind and time, of what we like to call,
This blog is about inventing, sharing and enjoying some amazing tools we can use to enhance our lives. It's bound to be riotous and irreverent, and is probably not for the faint of heart.
A Frugal Goddess is a woman who knows how to coax out the deliciousness in every day, while being resposible her budget, responsive to her loved ones and fearlessly finding herself in just the right flow to create whatever she wants. Including world-changing adventures, financial freedom, more joy for herself and her family.
And the pleasure tools we'll be developing and discussing are exactly the medicine for men, too.
It all starts with your desires, your dreams, your pleasure. Noticing what makes you feel alive. Doing this more deliberately and supporting each other in doing so. Life is delicious, let's dine!
"Life is a feast, and most poor suckers are starving." - Rosalind Russell, as Auntie Mame
***
In advance, I'd like to let you know that this conversation owes a debt of gratitude to a writer and educator named Regena Thomashauer, aka Mama Gena, founder of the School of Womanly Arts in New York City. You can learn more about her at www.mamagenas.com.
She dares to posit that our pleasure is the life force in action - and therefore completely worthy of our undivided attention.
She is a founder, among many other delicious, dynamic and fearless humans throughout life, mind and time, of what we like to call,
"The Pleasure Revolution."
Perhaps you'd like to take part?
Wear what you like - this is a co-ed slumber party. Bring over your favorite snack, plus a bit to share, and cozy up for a discussion on the most relevant of topics: your joy and pleasure!
***
Today's Exercise: Consider how you spend your life's energy. What proportion of your time is to maintain the bureaucratic aspect of life - and how much of it is sheerly for your enjoyment? How would it feel if you were to give pleasure more priority?
Sounds like selfishness? Not at all! A happy woman is a juicy woman, poised to bring her family and community MORE... More interest, more freedom, more adventure.
And the same goes for men! The key to everyone's personal power is right at that spot where we are loving life.
Perhaps you'd like to take part?
Wear what you like - this is a co-ed slumber party. Bring over your favorite snack, plus a bit to share, and cozy up for a discussion on the most relevant of topics: your joy and pleasure!
***
Today's Exercise: Consider how you spend your life's energy. What proportion of your time is to maintain the bureaucratic aspect of life - and how much of it is sheerly for your enjoyment? How would it feel if you were to give pleasure more priority?
Sounds like selfishness? Not at all! A happy woman is a juicy woman, poised to bring her family and community MORE... More interest, more freedom, more adventure.
And the same goes for men! The key to everyone's personal power is right at that spot where we are loving life.
Can we afford not to prioritize our pleasure?
For your comment: Tell about an unexpected pleasure you found recently.
(Mind you, if things get too smutty around here, I may have to edit for the public view - but be assured, I enjoyed it all the same!)
"Give a man a free hand, and he'll run it all over you." - Mae West
Adrienne Prince, author of The Frugal Goddess, is a bad-ass world-saving bitch. As are most of her friends. (Though some would prefer she not use that term.)
For your comment: Tell about an unexpected pleasure you found recently.
(Mind you, if things get too smutty around here, I may have to edit for the public view - but be assured, I enjoyed it all the same!)
"Give a man a free hand, and he'll run it all over you." - Mae West
Adrienne Prince, author of The Frugal Goddess, is a bad-ass world-saving bitch. As are most of her friends. (Though some would prefer she not use that term.)
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